Rejected by the CBC

Once again I am faced with a bitter letter of rejection.

One of the bigger buzzes in the Canadian music/hockey fan scene these days is a CBC (Canadian Broadcast Corporation) contest. CBC has invited any and all Canadians to submit their songs for selection as the new Hockey Night in Canada theme song.

Hockey Night in Canada is a Saturday night Canadian institution. Its theme, a professional instrumental piece written by a jingle writer many years ago, can be sung or hummed more accurately by Canadians of all ages than our own national anthem. The CBC decided against renewing its agreement with the composer earlier this year, which paved the way for purchase by another network. TSN plans on using the theme during its weekly game coverage.

Call it a bold move. Call it a waste of money. Whatever you call it, this is also a chance for hockey loving musicians and amateurs alike to try their hand at composition. It also may spell the death of Nickelback’s bastardization of “Saturday Night” that CBC has been playing for far too long. Thank God.

CBC was unprepared for the response. They’ve been swamped by entries from every day Joe Canadians to Randy Bachman. (If you don’t know who Randy Bachman is, then I shake my head at you.) Fans can preview anthems on the CBC contest website and offer advice and comments.

As an avid hockey fan, I thought it would be fun to write a song, but I’m not a composer or an instrumentalist. A successful brand is very unlikely to have lyrics, so I didn’t write anything. However, I entered one of my songs just for kicks.

Called “Toe to Toe,” it’s a racy song about a woman beckoning a man to come and play, with lots of hockey innuendo. I’m a big fan of innuendo. I knew the song had no chance of selection, but I thought I’d put it out there and see what response came in.

The response came in to my inbox not twenty minutes after I uploaded the song. “Your Anthem has been denied” read the subject line of the email.

So once again I have been rejected. While I’m not surprised, I’m a little disappointed that CBC wouldn’t even post it. As for the lyrics, well, I listened to two people having sex on a CBC radio drama at eleven in the morning this summer, so what’s a little innuendo on a website?

Given the quality of many anthem entries, I pity the selection committee.

I will put up the song on my MySpace site, www.myspace.com/abbypond, if you’d like to hear it. If you like it as much as I do, you can purchase my CD or download the song at cd.baby.com/cd/abbypond.