A day in the life of...my dog

4:30 am: Wake owner for no apparent reason with a paw to the face. Immediately resume sleeping at the end of the bed.

6:30 am: Again paw owner in the face.

7:45 am: Finally rouse owner from bed. Run to the door for a bathroom break.

7:48 am: Return inside, demanding breakfast.

7:49 am: Scratch head with hind foot.


7:50 am: Finish food. Demand access to the great outdoors once again. Hound owner into hour long walk.

8:40 am: Owner finally ready to leave. Bark and spin in circles.

8:41 am: Sniff everything along the walking path. Chase unwary pedestrians and attack all cyclists. Eat and/or roll in anything particularly revolting. Run away from owner.

9:41 am: Nap in the truck, or in the house. Guard toys against all comers. Awaken at any noise to enforce territory.

10 am-2 pm: Sporadic napping, with the occasional drink break. Slobber water all over the floor.
2 pm: demand another walk. Follow owner around whining until successful.

2:30 pm: Repeat activities from morning walk. Find disgusting bone in the woods. Refuse to return home without it.

3:30 pm-3:35 pm: Chew bone contentedly for several minutes. Abandon, never to be touched again unless another dog shows interest.

3:36 pm- 6 pm: Nap.

6 pm: Demand supper. Accept no alternatives. Demand scraps of the owner's supper as well.

7 pm: Nap.

9 pm: One last adventure into the great outdoors. Bark at odd sounds in the darkness.

9:30 am-4:30 am: Nap.

Repeat.